Well I passed my Gestational Diabeties test so thats good. Im really happy and just have to accept that my baby is big! And this has an upside if I am early her chances are increased. I have to think positively, Im sure this has helped me throught the early days and the moments when i have been panicing.
I think its important to remind myself how hard early pregnancy is. The fear is enormous, the risks of loosing the baby in the first 12 weeks then the risks for me upto 24 weeks. We will have a daughter for life and this pregnancy, this amazing thing that is happening to me so we can complete our family. This is our dream and its coming true. We have to believe in it and we have, through the very very dark days after we lost Archie.
DP and I had such difficult times, and Im sure DS suffered. Life was so black and I remember just not talking for hours, days. All my mind could think about was my lost baby and if there was any hope I would get pregnant again. And here I am, this is what it has all been about. Not only we will be the perfect 2.4 children family but we are happy too! Just so happy. I love my partner more than I can describe. She has been there through the most toughest of times and never faultered.
I am so lucky that someone can love me that much and hang in there with me.
I am snowed in today, I have had a long lie in but Im missing my little boy now! And I want to be curled up on the sofa reading to him....endlessly! Or playing with his train set. But he is with his Granny so Im going to enjoy some time to get some jobs done, Grace is kicking me and its lovely to feel Im not alone!
We picked up her pram yesterday, we very rarely buy the nicest thing we can and this is a lovley pram, we even got a pink pram blanket! We then went to have tea then we went to the cinema, so rare for us to have such time together and it was so special!
Well thats me for today. I am happy, reminding myself of how much I have not what I dont. Thats so important!
The picture at the top is DS on a swing with a friend!
